Monday, December 17th, 2012...An ultrasound of our tiny baby showed a heartbeat. We hadn't lost him afterall. But that heartbeat was quite low so we'd come back in two weeks to check it again. Felt like the longest two weeks of my life.
Tuesday, January 8th, 2013...A follow-up ultrasound showed our tiny baby had a very normal heart rate. And I felt my lungs release a slow breath of relief and gratefulness.
Friday, March 29th, 2013...Our 20-week ultrasound revealed a perfectly healthy little baby boy and once again we counted our blessings as we remembered where we were at just 14 weeks earlier and thought about what could have been.
Friday, August 9th, 2013...At 8:00am we casually (and excitedly) walked into Maple Grove Hospital, anxious to meet this little miracle of a baby and hold him in our arms for the first time. The morning was calm and nerve-wracking and exciting and peaceful all at the same time. The things I hope I never forget about the morning we became a family of five:
--Hugging Caleb before we walked out the door on our way to the hospital...thinking this is the last time I hug him when he is my baby...in a few hours, there would be a new baby and Caleb would suddenly look much bigger to me.
--Looking over at my dad as I was getting my IV put in and seeing all the love a daddy has for his grown-up little girl...mixed with a little concern.
--That Mackenna came along, brought her stuffed bunny for me to hold, and held my hands as I got my "pokes". And then the tears she shed when we told her that she needed to go back home and wait until our baby was here...she wanted to stay with me...and she threw her little arms around my neck in a hug that I can still feel. Oh how I love my kids...we are SO blessed.
--Justin. Smiling confidently at me so that I wouldn't be nervous. Holding my hand and whispering words of calm, peace, and encouragement throughout the surgery. Tearing up and grinning ear to ear when he caught that first glimpse of our healthy baby boy. Singing, bouncing, laughing as he held his new baby for the first time...the epitome of pure joy.
--My mother-in-law SO excited to meet her newest grandson...I don't think the smile faded from her face all day.
--The way my mom stayed with me in the hospital that night, getting absolutely no sleep, helping to care for myself and her new grandson so that Justin could be at home managing Mackenna's diabetes. Such a loving and servant-hearted woman.
--And of course meeting my new son. I remember the doctors and nurses making 10 pound guesses on his weight before it was announced. I remember that he had hair...very unlike our other two kiddos. I remember us laughing about how he kept sticking his tongue out. I remember holding him for the first time...nursing him for the first time...kissing him for the first time and just feeling so blessed.
Lucas Jack Sutkowski
August 9, 2013
10:00am
9lbs 8.4oz
21.5in
perfect.
miracle.
blessing.
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