Mackenna...my tiny hero

It's been three weeks now, since Mackenna was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.  We've had bad days and good days.  It seems to be one of those 2-steps-forward-1-step-backwards kind of situations.  After a few really great days last week, we had a moment on Sunday when I stood outside our bathroom listening to Mackenna cry and scream through an insulin injection and I just lost it.  It is by FAR the most difficult thing I've ever had to do...listen to my own child cry and scream through something that we have to do to her 4 times a day.  It's not always that bad.  Sometimes there are no tears and no screams...and those are the times when my blood pressure drops closer to normal and I feel hopeful for better days ahead. 

Our first night in the hospital, I slept for 45 minutes.  The rest of the time, I watched her, prayed for her, cried...and I wrote her a letter.  I hadn't read it again until this morning and it was almost therapeutic for me.  Funny how I wrote these words to comfort and encourage her...and they are now comforting and encouraging me...God is funny like that.  Here is part of what I wrote...maybe these words can be of comfort to you as well...

"...with all that is changing and new for you, many things have not and will not change at all.  Your mommy and daddy adore you.  We love you tons and we are amazed at how brave you are.  But as much as we love you, (and as hard as this is to believe) there is One who loves you even more.  God loves you more, Mackenna!  He is holding you when you're scared and when you're hurt.  He is the Mighty Healer.  He loves you so much that He would rather die than be without you...and HE is in control of all of this.  I'm so thankful for a God who cares so deeply for his children...knows what they need...and does not hold back.  I'm pretty sure we are all going to learn a lot more about God's love and provision as we journey through this new life together..."

I can't have a blog post without photos!  I took these after Mackenna's preschool graduation, one week after being home from the hospital.  The things I notice about these images...
--I notice the pink bracelet on her wrist that says, "I have Type 1 Diabetes."
--I notice the bandaid on her finger from a poke earlier that day.
--I notice the huge smile on her face.
--I notice her gorgeous blue eyes.
--I notice her goofy, silly personality.
--I notice that while many things have changed, more things have stayed the same.
--I realize how incredibly blessed we are to have been able to brought our sweet girl home from the hospital on May 9th...because I know many parents take their children to the emergency room and do not get to take them home again.
--I remember that God is good.